"True Love"
This is not one of those mushy mushy posts. It is about "true love". In quotes.
Recently, I was caught up in a situation where I was explained the true meaning of "true love" - in quotes. (The person actually stressed on the words, and if he had been writing them in MS Word, he'd have changed the font size and emboldened them and maybe even have underlined them. Italics too perhaps. Whereas I am just using quotes. So thank your lucky stars.)
The main crux of the gentleman's discourse was that "true love" (in quotes) is supposed to be self-sacrificing, it's above everything in life, live to experience it, meaning of existence, love everything about mate, holding hands and staring into each others eyes in public, (annoy the hell out of people watching you), flowers, chocolates, notes, phone calls two times per day, sighs, sleepless nights... you get the point.
Excuse me; and as ar would say, call him uncle and smack him on his um... tushi, but that is not how "true love" (notice the quotes) works. Well, it might, for about two years max, if you're that guy who was telling me about it, but then either you or the mate will get so sick of it that they will probably shoot you the next time you bring them flowers and call them with the special name you have for them. What is it about special names between couples anyway? What's so special about Baby-boo or Ikky-Bikky or even Coochie-coo?
Anyway, what I was saying was that "true love" (ahem... quotes) is not so rosy. It's not all good. It's not everything in life. It's not perfect. Okay, I'm not saying it doesn't exist. It might exist between some people. It might even last a whole lifetime; BUT (yes, there is a but) it's rare. Very, very rare. Like 'not seeing buffalos on hyderabad streets' rare.
When men and women are together, there will be fights, disagreements, tears, ruffled feathers; not just chocolates and candlelit dinners and flowers and mush. It's just the way we are. That Mars and Venus thing. I mean, how can you be goody-goody devoted like that to somebody all your life? There have to be days when you'll feel grumpy and when she asks you to shave two times a day cos the stubble... um... is not good at certain times, you'll glare at her, maybe even give her a sharp retort. It's bound to happen.
Most of this stupid naive romanticism is among the young stars-in-eyes generation. I wonder what causes it. Yash Chopra type movies? Mills and Boon? Oh, and while we are on the topic of Mills and Boon (we're not exactly on topic here, but I take the creative license of being the writer of this blog and force it down the throat of anyone who is reading), those novels really do the young women in with a black haired muscle-showing guy encircling his arms around a half-naked girl, (well, it's lacy lingerie actually,) who's just waiting to be taken. Filled with words like "unsheathed his manhood" and "deflowered" and "she melted against his hardness", these novels are just fillers for those waiting in the dentist's office times. Not to be taken so seriously so as to believe in "true love" (in quotes).
Wake up people. That's not "true love", with or without quotes. Life is not a Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge. Life starts after the girl hops on to the train after clutching the outstretched hand and then she chastises Mr. Baadshaah of Bollywood for not having the effing presence of mind to pull the chain to stop the train. Happily ever after are not the words which will be written in your life story. Your happily ever after will happen one day at a time and -- wait, take a deep breath -- the ever after MIGHT NOT EVEN BE HAPPY!
End of Grumpy morning rant. Have a nice day. Smile and the world smiles at you and all that too.
Recently, I was caught up in a situation where I was explained the true meaning of "true love" - in quotes. (The person actually stressed on the words, and if he had been writing them in MS Word, he'd have changed the font size and emboldened them and maybe even have underlined them. Italics too perhaps. Whereas I am just using quotes. So thank your lucky stars.)
The main crux of the gentleman's discourse was that "true love" (in quotes) is supposed to be self-sacrificing, it's above everything in life, live to experience it, meaning of existence, love everything about mate, holding hands and staring into each others eyes in public, (annoy the hell out of people watching you), flowers, chocolates, notes, phone calls two times per day, sighs, sleepless nights... you get the point.
Excuse me; and as ar would say, call him uncle and smack him on his um... tushi, but that is not how "true love" (notice the quotes) works. Well, it might, for about two years max, if you're that guy who was telling me about it, but then either you or the mate will get so sick of it that they will probably shoot you the next time you bring them flowers and call them with the special name you have for them. What is it about special names between couples anyway? What's so special about Baby-boo or Ikky-Bikky or even Coochie-coo?
Anyway, what I was saying was that "true love" (ahem... quotes) is not so rosy. It's not all good. It's not everything in life. It's not perfect. Okay, I'm not saying it doesn't exist. It might exist between some people. It might even last a whole lifetime; BUT (yes, there is a but) it's rare. Very, very rare. Like 'not seeing buffalos on hyderabad streets' rare.
When men and women are together, there will be fights, disagreements, tears, ruffled feathers; not just chocolates and candlelit dinners and flowers and mush. It's just the way we are. That Mars and Venus thing. I mean, how can you be goody-goody devoted like that to somebody all your life? There have to be days when you'll feel grumpy and when she asks you to shave two times a day cos the stubble... um... is not good at certain times, you'll glare at her, maybe even give her a sharp retort. It's bound to happen.
Most of this stupid naive romanticism is among the young stars-in-eyes generation. I wonder what causes it. Yash Chopra type movies? Mills and Boon? Oh, and while we are on the topic of Mills and Boon (we're not exactly on topic here, but I take the creative license of being the writer of this blog and force it down the throat of anyone who is reading), those novels really do the young women in with a black haired muscle-showing guy encircling his arms around a half-naked girl, (well, it's lacy lingerie actually,) who's just waiting to be taken. Filled with words like "unsheathed his manhood" and "deflowered" and "she melted against his hardness", these novels are just fillers for those waiting in the dentist's office times. Not to be taken so seriously so as to believe in "true love" (in quotes).
Wake up people. That's not "true love", with or without quotes. Life is not a Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge. Life starts after the girl hops on to the train after clutching the outstretched hand and then she chastises Mr. Baadshaah of Bollywood for not having the effing presence of mind to pull the chain to stop the train. Happily ever after are not the words which will be written in your life story. Your happily ever after will happen one day at a time and -- wait, take a deep breath -- the ever after MIGHT NOT EVEN BE HAPPY!
End of Grumpy morning rant. Have a nice day. Smile and the world smiles at you and all that too.
posted by Aran at 2:17 AM
8 Comments:
just read thru a couple of your posts - specially the one about there being this word in the dictionary... and wondering whether whacky is derived from whack or is it supposed to mean wacky
Whacky and wacky are the same... whacky just has a little more of it.
See: http://www.answers.com/whacky&r=67
Nice talk on love without getting mushy! :)
I cant but help quote Gibran.
Because love glorifies and crucifies. It makes the branches grow and then trims them. It crushes men until they are flexible and docile. It burns them in divine fire so that they can convert into sacred bread to be served at God's banquet.
However, if you are afraid and want to find in love only peace and pleasure, better that you stay away from the door and seek some other world where you will be able to laugh but without any joy, and cry but without using up all your tears.
Love gives nothing and asks for nothing besides itself. Love neither possesses nor is possessed - because it suffices to itself.
And do not try to direct its course - because love thinks that you are worthy, it will lead you to where you have to go.
[Posted by mls on Thursday Jun 3, 2004 at 12:00 pm]
Thanks so much for the quote mls. That was lovely. Enjoyed it and am still smiling. :)
[Posted by Aran on Thursday Jun 3, 2004 at 12:20 pm]
well, realistically, that is what love is. there is no pair of people in the world in love without the occassional disagreement.
is that reason enough not to aim for perfection?
realist or dreamer? thats a constant battle.
this being an informed choice, i choose to be a dreamer and say i aim for happily ever after!
[Posted by aloque on Thursday Jun 3, 2004 at 1:02 pm]
hahahahaahahahahahhahahahahaha.... loved that crack bout the mills and boons.... dammeth that was funny..... unsheathed his manhood.. oh god... lol...... on the topic of love.... Let me quote Badcash "Love is just a door away from heaven...Heaven shunned me for my weakness, My weakness shunned me into silence..‘Tis sad you fell in love with my silence.. Now how can I be strong for you...for us???? "
[Posted by ar on Thursday Jun 3, 2004 at 2:01 pm]
wow..now I mustu also quote something profoundu...ah, I have it!
"you are my fire...my one desiiirrreee...I want it thaaaat waaaay..tell me whieee...???"
*does the beggarly dance with the hat thingie*
[Posted by Neurotron on Thursday Jun 3, 2004 at 2:42 pm]
But, seriously...
For me, true love is false. Trying to define love is like trying to define life - impossible. Because it is highly dependent on interpretation. Thus my 'love' is different from yours; thus there can be no true or false or anything else.
It's like a house of cards. I started out with an image of a castle. Everytime we fight, the foundations shake and a couple of levels fall. I begin to wonder if this house is a huge waste of my time. Then she smiles, and 4 levels are magically rebuilt in an instant...
[Posted by Neurotron on Thursday Jun 3, 2004 at 2:51 pm]
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