Blind faith

There was a great show on in my house yesterday. It all started when my grandfather's 2000 bucks went missing. They were kept in a folder which he uses for his stuff and according to him, he kept them there and then about two hours later, they weren't there.

So, someone knew about this female who does a seance-type-thing and tells you who the thief is. And this someone decided to tell that to my grandmother and she decided to let the fem come and do it.

The procedure is like this. The seance lady (SL) washes the floor first. Apparently this is very important. Otherwise the dead soul won't talk to you. Dead people are very hygienic, I suppose. Well, anyway, after that, she lights two incense sticks and readies her brass "lotha". For those of you who don't know what a lotha is, sheesh, you're missing a lot of sick jokes in life related to the thing. (It's a kind of a tumbler. That's the best I can do.) So she fills the lotha with water, and, damn, that thing is heavy!

Three people perform ablutions (this is important too, dead people and cleanliness remember?) and sit cross-legged on the floor. Two of these people have their thumbs out (like in a thumbs up sign) and they keep these four thumbs on the floor, on bunched fists, in a sort of a square on top of which the lotha rests. Then the real fun starts.

The SL parks her nose about three inches from the lotha and staring at it intensely, starts murmuring stuff. Then after a bit she starts asking the lotha who took the money. I can't help wondering if the dead soul who speaks isn't pressurised from so much of the attention. I mean, there were about 15 of the people there to see the 'show' and then the SL staring at the lotha so intently, placing all her faith on it and all. Anyone would be nervous and trembling. But maybe dead ones are above all this, huh?

So the result of all this - the lotha is supposed to rotate when the name of the thief is pronounced. And the SL, while talking of who she thought the thief was, was almost shouting at the lotha, compelling the damn thing to move. But it didn't. The show was a dud.

Then SL decided one of the two people thumbing the lotha weren't supporting it properly and she moved them and sat down herself to do it. This time, of course, once the name was uttered, the lotha 'spontaneously' started to move. Surprise! It moved slowly, all of one inch and then started toppling off and had to be removed from the thumb throne. I was thinking maybe it would do a full rotation or something, but you know, it's kind of difficult to move your thumb so much, that too inconspicuously. To those of us who were looking at this as a sort of enjoyment, with absolutely no belief that these things work, it was clearly apparent that SL was moving the thing with her thumbs. To those who were blinded by the stupidity, the thief was found out and chai was passed around and all of them were happy, satisfied, relieved.

Is there no end to stupidity?

I must say though, that I was kinda disappointed. I would so have liked this thing to work. I mean, it would have been an opportunity to know of all the answers which have plagued my conscience!
Did that snotty nosed boy in 2nd S really take my glitter pencil?
Is 5th July really the day I'm going to get lucky?
If it's not, am I ever going to get lucky?
Can I ever have a baby monkey as a pet?
Will I ever land a dream job? (def: Where I don't have to work and I get paid lots.)
Can I persuade my parents to paint my room a hair-raising, blinding shade of orange?
When will Thackeray die?
Will I ever learn to fly a helicopter?
Will I prove them all wrong?
Is there life on other planets/space/inside my fridge?
Why can't they get better looking heros for telugu movies?
Do I have a birthmark in... *someplace*? (this one is for checking :))
What's Sujal's telephone number? address? likes? dislikes? (okay, okay)
What's Milind Soman's ... *droooooool, dissolves in a puddle just at the thought*
When will I be famous?
When will I be infamous? ;)
World peace? (dumb question)
Will I have to change my cellphone number because of the sick crank calls I'm getting?
Did HE go watch 'Girlfriend'?
Why yellow?
Ten inches??!!!!

Sigh. I could go on and on...