In·so·ma·ni·a (n.)
When the chronic inability to fall asleep or remain asleep for an adequate length of time induces mental and physical hyperactivity, disorganization of behavior, and elevation of mood.Lately, I've not been sleeping for more than 2.5 hours at a time. Moreover, these 2.5 hours happen at the oddest of times in the 24 hours. One could argue that there are no odd times during a day, merely tried and trusted ones, because after all, days are nothing but cyclical and repetitive. Anyhow, by odd, I mean odd for sleep. Normal people do not sleep from 5:30 - 8:00 p.m. Nor from 1:00 - 3:30 a.m. and while I certainly do not claim normality in most areas of life, I was once a normal eight-plus hour sleeper. Now, I'm the 2.5 hour non-normal non-sleeper.
[Latin însomnia, from însomnis, sleepless, and Greek maniâ: in-, not; + somnus, sleep, and Middle English, madness, Late Latin]
This state of non-sleep has been having severe repercussions in my social life (or whatever passes for it nowadays. (Yes, I know I need a life. (Do not say it. (Thank you)))). I now have time for all those IM people situated all over the world. I'm perpetually available around the clock. I can talk to anybody anywhere at whatever time it suits them. Idaho? Yes, I'm here. London? Sure. Dubai. Yup, here. India? Oh yes. Australia? Present ma'am. This is grave indeed because I'm sure everyone knows what too much of a good thing can do to people. I think some of them have been secretly hating me for the past week or so, but they won't tell me and I know but I won't tell them that I know, and they probably know that I know but they still will not come out and tell me. It's a secretive world we live in, for appearances.
Another problem with the sleeplessness has been the mania. The mood has been excessively manic. Like a bipolar disorder without the depression. I've been all sunshiny and hyper. This is good in small doses, but not for days. There are times when one is supposed to be composed, sedate even. Nobody can tolerate an excessively happy person continuously. Not even your own mother. It's just not possible. There will come a time when you will want to slap the person because she's grinning too much. It gets on your nerves like that. Entirely normal. So the only possible reason why I haven't been slapped yet is because it's kind of hard to slap through IM windows. (Yes, I did tell you my life revolves around those, didn't I?)
But wait, I'm being very superficial here! Shouldn't I be more worried about the health problems that can arise from not getting enough sleep? Or the under-eye circles? Or the hair fall? Does one suffer from hair fall if one doesn't sleep enough? Whatever... let's just blame it on sleeplessness and get on. I'm sure there are too many other things to worry about. Like... what if I'm losing my youth? There's this tiny old lady who lives opposite our house who wakes up at 2:30 in the morning and cooks. Yes, cooks. Our balcony overlooks her kitchen, with the road in between, and whenever we're up late, we can hear her pottering around in there.
Wait. Why am I thinking about her now? Of course I'm not going to go dotty like that just yet. I'm not. It's not my time. It's just a little sleep, nothing else. What's 2 hours or 8 hours? Nothing major. Not sleeping doesn't mean I've gone crazy, does it? Even though I've used big words like mania and bipolar disorder in this post, it doesn't mean that I'm losing my marbles. Of course it doesn't. Yes. I'm quite okay without sleep, thank you.
The sleep will come. One just has to believe in it.
10 Comments:
its is quite normal to go through phases of insomnia when you are into your 20s. And i guess no one hates you for being happy , unless its origin is 'jealousy'.
No, not jealousy Jai. haven't you ever felt like hitting someone who was all sunshine and joy? It kind of grates on your nerves if it goes on long enough.
na... not really!
All power to you then.
I could share some with u if u want.
Thank you but no. I wouldn't be me without my quirks.
You've got a nice blog here.. Even I suffer from insomnia although I make it a point to sleep for atleast 4 hours daily.. And sometimes if someone is just too enthusiastic, I do feel like chopping his head off.. *chop* There you go.. You sound to cheerful for me.. *thud*
P.S: Can I blogroll you.. me a novice when it comes to bloggin. n i must say ur style of bloggin is quite influential :D
Thank you.
Yes you can blogroll me but there's been a truly distressing transgression. My angels. My angels. My angels!!! :(
--headless and in mourning.
I hello-ed you from Dubai last night. Where were you ?
Sleeping ? :D
Please do not try to tarnish my sleepless image Tania. I will not have it! If you hello-ed, I must've hello-ed right back.
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